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The Anatomy Of A Bad Guest Post Pitch

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The first thing I do when I wake up is grab my iPhone and delete about 40 junk emails that come in overnight.  I do this while eating my Cheerios.  No matter how many times I unsubscribe, the trash keeps coming.

This morning I received this subject line:  “Regarding Guest Post Opportunity On Your Blog.” I’m sure you’ve all gotten these.  I’m sure some of us have sent our share of these.  So why did I stop to read this one?  Why didn’t it get deleted with my other morning garbage?  Not because it was good, but because I was drawn to it (though not for the right reasons).

SUBJECT: Regarding Guest Post Opportunity On Your Blog

Hi There,

My name is [AUTHOR NAME] I run [AUTHOR SITE]. I’m interested in writing a guest post for you. I’ve included a few ideas on topics below that I thought would be a good fit for your readers:

=> [ TOPIC 1]

=> [ TOPIC 2]

=> [ TOPIC 3]

Here is an example of a past article I’ve written previously:

[example 1 at Problogger]

[example 2 at Search Engine Journal]

[example 3]

I know you’re busy, so I can write everything up and send it to you in one document, which you can drop right into your website.

 

Thanks,

[AUTHOR NAME]

I’m not against guest posting.  I do, however, wince a little when I see the tactic poorly executed in 2013.  This is an old tactic now, and I like to think it’s matured.

This type of prospecting email may work fine when you’re pitching a site who’s model is to publish guest posts.  They’d snap up this type of opportunity faster than me with a plate of hot wings.  But for my site, I don’t usually have much guest posting here.  It’s not because of any reason besides pickiness.  Anthony Pensabene is the only one so far, and that’s because it was unique, he knew my blog’s tone, he’s a known entity, and he’s a very clever writer.

See, I knew as much about him as he knew about me and my site.

In the case of the guest post pitch, I didn’t get the feeling this author took the time to review my site at all.  The three titles he pitched didn’t really fit my style of writing or my subject matter.  The truth is, I’m actually open to guest posting pitches.  I would have been excited if this were a thorough pitch.  I really could have taken it (or at least gotten to know the writer and worked with him in some capacity going further).

What I Would Have Changed

I would have started with some research.  I would have spent some time on the Greenlane blog to see what kind of posts have been done to date.  The titles sent over, while I censored them above, were akin to “top 5 ways to do something that’s been rehashed a million times in the SEO blogosphere.”  I don’t really have much content like that anymore. Frankly, it’s rare when I read that kind of article now and it doesn’t come off as lazy.  I would have thought up some ideas that flow with my blog.  How about a take on something I’ve written about before?  I’d much rather you come me with the concept of something unique, than a backlog of generic, homogenized, no-frills copy.

I would have written a better subject line.  The subject was confusing.  Regarding what guest post opportunity?  I haven’t actually posted, tweeted, or facebooked any defined opportunity.  This subject was about as spammy as it gets for me, and looks a lot like the ones I now have a habit of deleting without a thought.  If it were me, I would have been more open to “An idea for a guest post,” or “Question for you.”  These are subjects suggesting a visitor wants to engage with me, not pitch me.  Or, just like the concept of “the neon resume gets remembered,” maybe a subject line of “Hey jerk, your opinion is wrong, and I have a counterpoint article to prove it.”  I would love that.  That would be speaking my language!

I get pitched all day long from vendors.  I welcome an opportunity that doesn’t feel like a hard sell.  I believe most business owners and webmasters agree.  We want to be pitched on really awesome ideas.  It makes us look better to our bosses and employees when those ideas come to life.

I would have used my real name.  The author’s name in this email was different than the name he used in his Search Engine Journal example.  Someone is getting duped.  See, I do my homework.  I suspect many others do as well.  Granted, I’m in the industry so I care about things like authorship and the writer’s reputation.  But if you use your real name, and have created a cache of great material, that’s a selling point.  Show me what you’ve written, and show me some kind of biography.  Show me that when you say you live in Montana, you don’t really live in Tibet.

I know you’re busy…   That line was the closer.  “Don’t worry, I’ll make it easy for you.”  I bet that sounds great to a lot of busy affiliates who run thousands of sites, especially if they don’t care about what gets published on their site.  But as a business owner, or even a webmaster looking out for the integrity of their site, I’d like to have some control on what I get and post.  I’d rather hear, “I’d love to work on some ideas with you.  I can send you over a draft.”

I would have customized the email.  I can still smell the cntrl-V in this email.  At least it was specifically sent to me (instead of being in the BCC field with 10,000 other recipients). Still, I’m sure this was an attempt to be scalable.  All good, but again, this type of email isn’t going to win a site like mine.  I have personality all over my blog, all over my Twitter, etc.  If the guy wrote, “hey man, I love your band,” that would have probably worked – I’m a sucker for egobait.  The truth is, a site like mine may not have a huge PageRank or DA (whatever you prefer), but I do have a big mouth.  I do have followers who would have seen this post.  I think I’m worth the little bit of extra attention.

Where do these opinions come from?  Experience.  I’ve tried – and failed – at good guest posting opportunities, and digital PR opportunities, because I was lazy.  I am lazy no more.

Scalable Marketing Shouldn’t Be The Same As Lazy Marketing

Our blog isn’t like Problogger, Ezine Articles, or even Search Engine Journal or Search Engine Watch.  We’re not a depository.  We have our own distinct voice (hopefully).  In my case, communication matters.

In my experience, most websites, media outlets, and companies want to be engaged.  If you think I’m a diva, I promise that some of the big, jucier prospects are even worse.  If you’re looking for quality over quantity in your links/citations/brand mentions, then you must be careful when you reach for your prospecting weapon of choice.  If you’re aiming for a cat, and you pull out a machine gun, you’re only going to make a mess.

Just to get ahead of any nasty comments or tweets – I am NOT against scalable or automated link building. I’d be an awfully big hypocrite. While I’m certainly not great at it, I’m always impressed by those who do it well.  By well, I mean smart.  Those who can do good marketing with scalable (or automated – I’m aware they aren’t the same thing per se) techniques are brilliant.  It certainly has its place.  But trying to win over a guy like me, that certainly isn’t its place.

No cats were harmed in this blog post.

 

 


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